Thursday, September 06, 2007

The Battle of Jumpingtaru

I feel I must tell you I was not actually here to witness this part of the story as I was busy with the group at the gold door at the time. I am telling you how it was told to me from various points of view that I have patched together to form one telling. I am rather suspect about some of the details but I’m sure its close enough to call history. Let me begin.

Jumpingtaru came running. The tiny taru warrior looked panic stricken as he stumbled over the rocky terrain. “I’m here-taru!” he shouted. “I want to helpy-welp…” Coming up behind him was quite possibly every monster and beastman from the entire cavernous area. “but get these things offy-wawfy me first!” Jumpingtaru dove behind Garness the great towering galka, a sharp contrast in size from the taru. Pulling out his little axes the taru put on his meanest face. “Come and get-taru me now beastie-weesties!”

“What did you do you fool?” Foxx said with a twisted angry glare.

“I did not a thing-taru wrong. They attack-tarued me without-taru reason-weeson.” Jumpingtaru stuttered. He usually didn’t use taru speak outside of his home land unless he was exceptionally nervous. The back of his trousers where shredded from the attempts of the creatures to stop him for a proper stomping and he must have narrowly made it.

During all this chitter-chatter the monsters had gathered in a great herd in front of the group of friends. Snarling and speaking to each other in their tongue I’m sure they were discussing their great fortune to have the band so hopelessly outnumbered.

“Stand together!” Garness demanded as he readied his great axe and took a defensive stance.

Gentle Kjarbo sword in hand had already been casting his best defensive spells on his friends in preparation for the inevitable battle. His mithran sister stood with her tail looped around his knee cracking her knuckles in anticipation of a good fight.

With a roll of dice Beldin announced with a pleased look on his face, “Luck is with us today. This will be easy.”

“Die or run for your lives beasts.” Garness growled as he led the charge meeting a cluster of thick shelled big claws and bowling them over like child’s toys. Like a blue ocean wave they rose up to try to overpower him. Garness whipped his great axe around his body in a cyclone of steal cracking the shells of the snapping creatures and sending crab parts and fluids flying in every direction. Alive with excitement Garness was all achatter. "RAAWWWWWWWW" "Damn you" "PINCH MY TAIL WILL YOU!?! EAT STEEL!!!"


"RAAWWRRR" "Hunh? YOU WANT SOME TOO" "Dammit Fox, that's my Tail not a shuagin's. Quit jabbing it with those thumb tacks you call a dagger!"

“At least twenty down by my hand.” Garness announced triumphantly. “How is everyone doing?” he asked, the thrill of the fight apparent in is voice.

Foxx pulled a sata attack from behind Garness and grumbled something about appreciation of thieves as another Sahagin fell to his blade.

“Fifty at least” Beldin called back as he shot another down from the back of the group. “I lost count honestly.”

“The lies!” Jenjen spat as her dragon kick sent a pugil flying towards Beldin at blinding speeds slapping its wet body hard against his nearly knocking him from his feet.

“You only do so well because you have Beldin and me to enfeeble the little beasties and magically super charge you.” Kjarbo smiled the pleasure of the fight evident in his face even over the intense concentration.

The pile of bodies was forming a great wall between the heroes and the flood of angry beasts yet the fish-like creatures and crabs continued to creep over their fallen comrades to take a shot at spilling blood.

Deciding to take a more offensive stance Foxx raced up the back of Garness as he was hunched over slightly after an especially hard swing. Leaping from Garness’ shoulders he flipped head over heals in a blinding flash of daggers and landed in the middle of a group of sahagin. With a cyclone attack half of the group where finished and the other half where easily taken down by the blades of the fearless party.

They were winning the battle of bad odds but even with Kjarbo working hard to keep the group fresh they were tiring. It was perfect timing for the coppery tentacles of a sea monk to creep over the pile of warm bodies. Everyone already had their hands full on the last of the creatures and hardly noticed as it wrapped a powerful tentacle around the tiny body of Jumpingtaru. “A littl-taru help please!” he shrieked as it slapped his tiny body against the floor.

“I got it!” Jenjen shouted as she turned to attack the creature ten times her size. Leaping onto its head she aimed her punches at its tender eyes causing it to buck up and shriek angrily. Dropping the tarutaru on his ample little bottom it focused its attention on the mithra riding it.

“Weeeee!” Jenjen shouted as she grabbed hold to ride wildly around the small space.

Beldin took aim. “Hold still gorgeous. I’ll shoot it down.”

Wide eyed Kjarbo leapt at Beldin knocking him too the ground but it was too late. The shot was fired in the chaos. Gasping from the shock of it Jenjen grabbed her thigh and fell from the beast as blood saturated her koshita.

Panic stricken Kjarbo and Beldin stumbled over each other to get to her. “Look what you did.” “Idiot” “Fool” “Son of a Dhamel” and other such statements where hollered by both but it was tiny Foxx who took care of it. Sneaking behind the sea monk he sliced it to sushi sized bits in a furry of swinging daggers.

Scooping his sister up in his arms Kjarbo cast healing magic and held her close.

“I wouldn’t have missed.” Beldin grumbled angrily as he looked over her with remorseful eyes.

“Good warm up but we have already taken too long to bother with resting. Time to pick up and get going.” Garness said as if he had not even seen the mishap. Slinging his axe over his shoulder he headed off towards the gold door. Once again assuming they would naturally follow soon enough.

*This story written with help from Garness the Great.


Kallo Landis said...

; ; where is teh kalloz?! you're delaying the awesomeness!

>.> did a great job with the fight scene ^.^ I know you've been putting it off for awhile in fear you wouldn't be very good at it--but help or not, it was done very well =D

Guankim said...

I still note the terror of Mithra riding tentacled-beasts in all your ecchi implications. :P And excellently written as always.

Poor JT, at least he didn't get slammed around TOO badly by the beasties, though he obviously needs a new set of trousers after that dash!

Alison the Amazing Thief said...

Thanks guys.

Kallo we still have to fight Pete the Meat and that's the one that is making me think extra hard. I might come to you for input once I figure out what help I need.

As for you Guankim... /slaps Guan's hand. I love you but you're a bad man.

Garness wrote his little dialog and sound effects as a comment on our linkshell forum and it was so funny I copied and pasted it in nearly word for word. Thanks again Garness for the giggles.

Beldin said...

Hey Kallo, I have a question for you.

Alison and I have been in talks of starting a ThumbMonkey's Radio, much like your LimitBreak Radio (which I'd love to be a guest on).

So my question is, do you have any suggestions or advice?

Alison the Amazing Thief said...

Oh no no. Dont pull me into that. I already said thats not for me. I dont have anything to say that anyone cares to hear. Nonsense stories is where I belong. Get Jenjen to help. I bet she has a prettier voice anyways.

Beldin said...

Alison, we've been over this. You have to be in it. You're the LS leader.

Besides. You owe me. I'm the one who got you into writing these stories in the 1st place.


Yea, Kallo, any suggestionsor advice?

Kallo Landis said...

Shoot me a message on MSN somtime -- or PM me on LBR. THis isn't really the ideal place for radio chatter =P

And I would totally listen just to be able to hear alison's voice =P I bet she gets all high squeky when she's flustered =P