Wednesday, April 25, 2007
“Which one?” He was fastening the buttons and looking up at me through the top of his eyes. I was a bit surprised to see Beldin looking so relaxed. “That one looks more like me but this shirt is more formal.”
He actually looked rather handsome and the weather was always perfect and sunny on Purgonorgo Isle. It was a perfect place for a wedding. The air was sweet and salty, the sand silky and white, and the water perfect crystal blue. It was a tropical paradise. It took some time to get here by boat but it was always well worth the trip.
“I think you should ask Jenjen. I’m surprised you don’t already have it decided before today.”
He just chuckled and smiled. He seemed much more at ease than I would have expected. “I think the more formal look is what Jenjen will like.”
“hum… I would agree. So you talked to her already then?” I inquired.
“Well just at the party. That was fun wasn’t it?” He grinned.
“So, she’s coming?” I prodded.
“Why wouldn’t she. This is her wedding too.” He was starting to look a little concerned.
“She was really mad about the party. Remember the rock hitting and stuff? I think you should find her and make sure she’s ok.”
He started tuning his communication pearl. Taking it out of his ear and shaking it he tried again. He started to look a little pale as he turned to me with his mouth dropped open. “She’s not online. Why would she have her pearls off on a day like today?”
“You need to find her.”
He wandered slowly to a beautiful lagoon while he fiddled with his pearl. I started to follow him at a distance.
“I need to be alone while I wait.” He said without even turning to see me following. Understanding I walked far off but still in eye shot. He dropped to his knees in the water and let his head fall to his chest while clutching the pearl. It was heartbreaking. How could he not have known she was angry?
She still had fifteen minutes to show up before she was considered late. I started asking who was coming but everyone was so sure no wedding would happen today they didn’t even bother taking the boat trip. I just sat down in the warm sand pulling my legs to my body and waited.
Shadows moved across the sand as the sun rose to midday with no bride. Neither I nor Beldin had moved in three hours. It didn’t seem right to leave him alone like this.
Then he got up and walked away. I knew he didn’t want me to follow him so I quietly watched him go. This is not exactly how I thought my duties as a chaperone would end. I could only hope they could work it out, really for Beldin’s sake. She was just what he needed. Maybe selfishly I wanted her to stay around too and I knew if she left Beldin behind she would leave the Thumbmonkeys. We were already very in love with her too. I didn’t want to see her go.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
I was a bit surprised and maybe a little nervous when she came in the room. No one else had come even though I told them she/I might need some support. I guess they figured the other party was enough excitement for one day.
As tempted as I was not to come myself I felt duty bound to sit sipping my favorite drink and wait. The archduke was letting us use his sitting room and it was very cozy in front of the crackling fireplace. It would have been a great place for a little party.
She didn’t say anything at first. It did horrible things to my nerves. She just walked into the room with her ears drooping and fell into the sofa. She looked so defeated. It broke my heart. Handing her a hot chocolate with extra whipped cream I waited for her to speak. Still unsure of my standing I didn’t know where to start.
“It’s a good location.” She said as she licked the cream off the top of her drink.
“I thought I was very cozy. I’m sorry it’s not a bigger party.” I replied.
“It’s better. I don’t feel like being around a big group tonight.” Her bottom lip quivered slightly as she finished.
“I’m so sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean for that to happen. I would never…” She cut me off before I could finish.
“No, I know. It’s not your fault. He’s just and idiot.” Her eyes were sharp and angry.
I couldn’t argue. “He does love you.”
“I love him.” She said as her face softened back into a pout.
“I know he didn’t mean to hurt you. He really does seem completely crazy about you. He listens to you like he never has to anyone else before. He just has some old habits that are going to be hard for him to break. He’s far from perfect but you’ll never find anyone else like him.”
She chuckled a little to herself. “He is one of a kind. I knew about how he acted around women but I thought he would change for me. Why am I not enough for him?”
“You’re right, he’s and idiot. He doesn’t deserve you but he’s adventurous and has a wild imagination and playful nature like no other. Seeing the world the way he sees it makes things more exciting and beautiful.”
She smiled, “Yeah, I noticed that about him.”
I was not about to bring up other traits we obviously both admired about him do to the delicate nature after current events.
“I guess it comes down to does the good outweigh the bad enough to make it worth the risk and can he give you what you’re looking for?”
“Good questions. I don’t think I know. I guess I have some thinking to do.” She sipped the hot chocolate and held the warm mug close to her body.
I nodded and leaned my head on hers sighing audibly. “I’m sorry. I still love you. Do you love me?” I asked sheepishly.
“Of course,” she said as she threw her arms around me. I jumped as she splashed some hot chocolate on me. I suspect it might have been on purpose but I may have deserved it so I didn’t make a fuss. “I was there. I saw what happened and you were not to blame. This is something Beldin will pay for.”
“I’m glad we’re ok.” I said as I hugged the little mithra tightly. “One question though. Will you get married tomorrow?”
She pressed her eyes against my sleeve as if she wanted to hide from the question. “I don’t know yet.”
Leaning my head on hers I stroked her hair. I felt so bad for her. This is not a bride’s dream come true. I was so glad I wasn’t in trouble in Jenjen’s eyes even if I still felt some responsibility for somehow not preventing this disaster but if it could happen the day before the wedding then why not after too? It was something they needed to address and it’s always better to get these things sorted out before the rings are exchanged and there is no going back.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
I admit I was a little upset when I received your last letter but then I realized you’re right. I’m not really the marrying type either and timing isn’t so good. I am awfully young and have a lot of training still to do. We are just fine as we are right? I understand why you would tell me to go marry another but I think I’ll just wait things out a bit longer and see what life throws our way.
I have missed you while you’ve been gone. The wedding between Jenjen and Beldin might have a little hiccup. I won’t know until tomorrow morning when the ceremony is scheduled. I’ll be sure to tell you more about it in my next letter. I wish you were here to help me with it. It seems like I get in a lot less bad situations when I have my paladin to watch over me. Just having you around cheering me on helps so much. I hope you can forgive me for being selfish in my desire to have you with me.
I hope your family is doing better. They must be thrilled to have you home after the tragic death of your father. Ever the paladin I would have been disappointed if you didn’t go home to help your mother raise your young brothers and sisters. Your life is not over, you just need to do something different for awhile. You made the right choice. I know it has been hard on you but I hope you know I will not forget about you just because our paths are separated for awhile.
So you are studying beastmaster now? It seems like an excellent way to develop yourself while you are away from experience parties for awhile. I’ll be sure to bring you some new equipment next time we can get together.
Please don’t wait too long before writing again and please reconsider using your communication pearls. You don’t have to do this alone.
Sealing the letter and handing it to my moogle for delivery my heart was heavy. I missed him so much and planning for this wedding made me want to be married more than ever. I knew I couldn’t say that to him right now. It was something I needed to keep to myself. Learning a little more independence had to be good for me.
Now I had the overwhelming task of going to talk to Jenjen. Willowkarr called Zerokb for me and canceled our food and entertainment. It was just going to be the chaperone and the bride for some girl talk. I still wasn’t sure if she even wanted to see me at all but I went to Jeuno to wait for her hoping she would come.